The word that scares everyone....

On February 5th, we met with a new pediatric neurologist who was the polar opposite of the asshat who works in our county. The new doctor greeted Kate and crouched down to talk to her. She talked to us. She LISTENED to us. We loved her.

Even though she told us the exact opposite of what we wanted to hear.

Kate has autism.

And it's funny (well, funny as in "strange" and certainly not funny as in "we're having such a good time"), I've asked doctors repeatedly, "Are you SURE it isn't autism?" They kept telling me, "no -- she's far too outgoing." As much as I knew that Kate was suffering from autism, it still has hit me hard. Hit both of us hard. To be honest, we are both still feeling shell-shocked. Scared. Angry. Confused. But we know this the diagnosis fits.

Sadly, it fits all too well:

1. We have to work to get eye-contact from Kate. We have to ask for it most of the time. And ask for it multiple times. Or take away an item. Or snap our fingers. Or clap our hands. Spontaneous eye-contact is rare.


2. Kate is absolutely pre-occupied with books. But because her fixation is books, even experts have overlooked this problem. "A kid fixated on books," they think, "what's bad with that?" Everything, if books are more important than people, relationships, learning, and living in everyone else's world.


3. Kate doesn't play with toys much. Or friends. When she does, it is because we have specifically taught her how and demanded that she do it if she wants her book.

So right now we are trying to learn and learn FAST. We don't know a lot, but we know this:

1. Autism is a medical disease that is evidenced by social withdrawal and several other physical symptoms such as digestive issues, sleep problems, learning problems, and impaired relationships.


2. If not treated intensively, it gets worse. Much worse.


3. The brain has a window of opportunity to be "molded" more easily. This is typically before age five. While good interventions always have their place, these interventions are more potent when the brain has better plasticity.


4. Some children can recover from autism; all can improve with treatment.



5. We're feeling fragile now, but we know we are strong. We could, however, use a few prayers right now.


6. Kate will become the best Kate she can be and there's nothing we won't do to ensure that happens.


7. God has blessed us with this beautiful, intelligent, intriguing, grace-filled child because we needed her and she needed us. God has a plan for us and, although it may be painful right now, we welcome His plan and every opportunity to show the world that everybody matters. We are still The Lucky Ones.

More later, but we wanted to update those of you who were wondering about Kate's appointment. The new neurologist has been a definite blessing. She also ordered more bloodwork on Kate (bloodwork, by the way, that I had requested from the AssHat neurologist of our county), and it's all come back abnormal. We will also be doing a 48-hour ambulatory EEG to determine if the abnormal electrical activity is truly seizures or something else. More on that fun procedure later.

Please keep us in your prayers. We'll be fine, but we're just in a bit of pain right now. Ultimately, we're grateful for a diagnosis that is leading us to a better understanding of our sweet girl.

With love from our home to yours,

The Lucky Ones